Comments on: Scattering of the Ashes – Wednesday https://www.davidhoughtonfamily.com/2011/07/24/scattering-of-the-ashes-wednesday/ Fri, 28 Jul 2017 01:37:22 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Anne Seales https://www.davidhoughtonfamily.com/2011/07/24/scattering-of-the-ashes-wednesday/comment-page-1/#comment-668 Anne Seales Wed, 27 Jul 2011 17:01:16 +0000 http://johnhoughton.com/?p=508#comment-668 Dear John, Linda, and surviving family, I am so very, very sorry for your loss. I too am a bereaved parent, and understand the shock and raw pain you are experiencing now. When you are ready - and it may be months, or even years - I encourage you to seek out a support group of other bereaved parents, grandparents & siblings. Some people start with a Hospice group, as they are more structured and usually led by a counselor. Mutual-support self-help groups such as The Compassionate Friends and BPUSA can provide long-term support as you learn to integrate this unique grief into your lives, and the people around you move on with their own lives at a speed that can be mystifying from your own perspective of an utterly changed worldview. We have a TCF chapter here in Santa Cruz; contact info is available via the chapter locator on the The Compassionate Friends website, easily googled. Wishing you restful sleep and sweet dreams of your loved ones, Anne Dear John, Linda, and surviving family, I am so very, very sorry for your loss. I too am a bereaved parent, and understand the shock and raw pain you are experiencing now. When you are ready – and it may be months, or even years – I encourage you to seek out a support group of other bereaved parents, grandparents & siblings. Some people start with a Hospice group, as they are more structured and usually led by a counselor. Mutual-support self-help groups such as The Compassionate Friends and BPUSA can provide long-term support as you learn to integrate this unique grief into your lives, and the people around you move on with their own lives at a speed that can be mystifying from your own perspective of an utterly changed worldview.

We have a TCF chapter here in Santa Cruz; contact info is available via the chapter locator on the The Compassionate Friends website, easily googled.

Wishing you restful sleep and sweet dreams of your loved ones,

Anne

]]> By: Therese Johannesson https://www.davidhoughtonfamily.com/2011/07/24/scattering-of-the-ashes-wednesday/comment-page-1/#comment-651 Therese Johannesson Tue, 26 Jul 2011 04:25:11 +0000 http://johnhoughton.com/?p=508#comment-651 Thanks again, John and Linda for sharing all of your beautiful memories and photos, and for honoring us with your sadness and grief. It is too huge to bear alone. I, too, have had dreams of Dede and the boys. In one dream we were at a park. Dede and I were doing one of the million things that moms do on outings to make sure everything was ready, but in my dream, they were all so real. I miss Dede's smile and here sweet forgiving phrase "no worries!" that she would say whenever things didn't go exactly as planned. I miss David's constancy and generous smiles and hugs. I feel them in so many of our daily activities. I see Ryan coming to music class wearing his rash guard. I see Luke reading at recess and hear his queries, always wanting more. The day before the memorial, I plunged into a cold mountain lake, something not characteristic of me, in honor of Dede. Linus got up on water skis for the first time that day. Today, I put on my wetsuit and romped in the waves boogie boarding with Dominic and Linus, something I have not done for years, again, in honor of our ocean loving family. I intend to do it more. Dominic and Linus and I will be at the lighthouse on Wednesday. We'll be sending our love and embracing you all. Thanks again, John and Linda for sharing all of your beautiful memories and photos, and for honoring us with your sadness and grief. It is too huge to bear alone. I, too, have had dreams of Dede and the boys. In one dream we were at a park. Dede and I were doing one of the million things that moms do on outings to make sure everything was ready, but in my dream, they were all so real. I miss Dede’s smile and here sweet forgiving phrase “no worries!” that she would say whenever things didn’t go exactly as planned. I miss David’s constancy and generous smiles and hugs.
I feel them in so many of our daily activities. I see Ryan coming to music class wearing his rash guard. I see Luke reading at recess and hear his queries, always wanting more.
The day before the memorial, I plunged into a cold mountain lake, something not characteristic of me, in honor of Dede. Linus got up on water skis for the first time that day. Today, I put on my wetsuit and romped in the waves boogie boarding with Dominic and Linus, something I have not done for years, again, in honor of our ocean loving family. I intend to do it more.
Dominic and Linus and I will be at the lighthouse on Wednesday. We’ll be sending our love and embracing you all.

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